The weekends over, and as much as I truly hate to admit it, this means I have to go back to living like an adult, with responsibilities’, and jobs. It’s the harsh reality of living a frightfully middle class existence. So what better way to spend it then with some ‘chuckle and move on’ sound-a likes to brighten a Grey morning.
Falls Like Teen Spirit
For a brief moment in time, there was a shovel that sounded perfectly like one of the greatest songs of all time. Sure, all Nirvana fans go through that phase where we think we don’t like ‘Teen Spirit. It’s a right to passage, but actually go back to it for a moment, and you’ll soon realize that it is, simply put, one of the best pieces of music ever. Ipso facto for a brief moment in time, this Shovel was one of the greatest pieces of music of all time.
One Moshed Over The Roosters Nest
You probably don’t listen to Death Metal, and that’s OK. The artistic nuances of Dying Fetus and Black Dahlia Murder are lost on most people anyway. It’s often said that no person’s first favorite band were Cannibal Corpse, despite what elitist morons will tell you on every Download Festival post ever. It’s important for all music to have gateway bands to get people into the scene. So listen to this Washing Machine and Rooster duet, and maybe you’ll be the next person flying the flag for UK Death Metal.
I! Still! Love! You! (Beatdown)
I don’t know the context to this video, and I think it would really compromise the integrity of the piece if I did. The guy’s vocal performance is as haunting as it is powerful, like Adele at the Brit awards it captivates so many. Where did he go after this you ask? Well some say he never got over the heartbreak, wrote an experimental album with Thom Yorke, and is now living in a tribe in Peru. Others say he just faded back to obscurity, you make your own mind up.
Coldplay In The Key Of #AHH
It’s hard being a Coldplay fan, and even harder to be a Coldplay fan in your mid twenties. Unfairly derided by so many, it’s just easier to spend your days nodding with ambivalence at the question “Do you like Coldplay?” then going home to cry into your Chris Martin scrapbook, it’s a sad reality, but they would want no less.
The G.O.A.T
Silly music sound-alike videos on the internet don’t have a world champion, but if they did this one would be John Cena, the original, the king, the one video to rule them all. It’s devilishly catchy for what is a Goat screaming at the top of it’s lungs. One day I dream of a reality where at a Taylor Swift show, for one brief glorious moment, the whole crowd would unite to scream like our woolen overlord during this song, but alas, the damn Pop machine wins again. In the mean time, enjoy.
For a while now i’ve been stuck in a musical rut. The same albums have been on a constant cycle for what feels like forever, and sometimes too much of a good thing can be its own demise. I find it far too easy to dial in a song that I know I can enjoy, rather than seize the initiative and search out something that’s going to tickle an aural tastebud. Discovering an album that you instantly relate to, something that grabs you by the balls, and shakes you to the core with it’s brilliance is a rare and wonderful feeling.
Normally I try to make 3 festivals every year, taking care to mix up what’s on offer at each to. Download scratches a particularly Metal itch, Bestival bring everything Electronic and forces it into all the orifices, and then there’s Glastonbury, the grand daddy, where anything can and probably does go if you look hard enough. This year though I only made it to Glasto, and whilst it was without a doubt the best week of my life, it left me missing out on wealth of music I could otherwise got stuck in to.
Most people are probably thinking, just pick and album and get going, but when faced with 80+ years of stunning music, where on Earth do you start? The advent of the Internet has given us access to an almost complete Library of recorded history at our fingertips. It’s unsorted, unfiltered and ready for your consumption. One would not kick someone in to the British Library and tell them, read some books. As a society, more and more we are told what we are to enjoy, and who is currently not on trend. Sorry Newton Faulkner but Dreadlocks and acoustic guitars is so Summer man, it’s Autumn get a fucking haircut.
My idea to alleviate all this pedantic nonsense, and finally be able to go back and listen to everything i’ve always wanted to, but never felt the need too is simple. I’m going to listen to one new album, every day, for as long as I can. It sounds silly, why should I have to force myself to do this? Surely if I want to listen to an album, I should just go ahead and do it no strings attached. Why enter in to a relationship with a different album every day, you pig. But it’s simple, when faced with the task of listening to something you’ve never heard, every single day, it allows you to think outside the box. I would never have decided to listen to Death Grips before. I have no reason to, they just aren’t on my cultural landscape. Now though I do. I have to listen to something on Sunday, and they are better than nothing. Not playing something is defeat, and I fucking hate losing. Especially if it losing to myself.
So forth I go, into the untamed jungle that is and entire planets Back Catalogue. Finally i’ll have an impetus to listen to The Smiths, Black Flag, Public Enemy, Radiohead and Death Grips. All bands that seem intimidating to an outsider, finding a start point would usually be a task, but when framed in the greater picture of achieving a meaningless goal of Audio discovery, it no longer matters. I like OK Computer, I can listen to King Of Limbs next week.
Further to broadening my mind (apparently) it will give me content for this here website you are reading, something that kind of sits in a frigid relationship with my own musical rollercoaster of emotions. So hopefully i’ll put up something soon, A quick note about what’s blowing my mind, albums that really disappoint, or the meta conversation about how this project is actually changing the way I look at music. Hopefully it will be an enjoyable project that spawns some writing someone may get a kick out of, and if it doesn’t? I might just find that one album that changes my life.
Tonight was the first time I haven’t been stood in a muddy field during August Bank Holiday weekend since 2010. Reading will always strike a chord with me, and the thought of not going this year was more upsetting than first realised. When the news came in that Paramore would be Co-Headlining with Queens Of The Stone Age I was surprised. They are a band that seemed to have been completely lost on me for as long as my memory serves. I always knew that Misery Business was a good song, and they were permanently emblazoned on the cover of all the magazines I would read as a teenager, and yet none of this ever really won me over. When younger, I think that truthfully I found it hard to connect with a female fronted band, despite liking their music. In my school days it always felt like you had to align yourself to one sub-set of music. Being in to the heavier end of the musical spectrum, it was hard to relate to a band that wasn’t beards, booze, anger, being really nasty, and shouting at people. As i’ve grown older i’ve matured, and now i’m able to enjoy all music without fear of retribution, i’ve realised that it’s time to get over ridiculous prejudices and actually give Paramore a fair chance.
It felt like there was no better time to judge a bands merits, than when they are playing the main stage of one of the most celebrated music festivals in the world. Going in I had very few expectations, but I knew that I enjoyed some of the songs, Pop-punk/Alt Rock sound is easy to listen to and easily identifiable, and we’ve all heard about the energy that they have. No band gets to headliner status at Reading & Leeds without reason, there has to be something about them. So heading in with an open mind, begrudgingly I sat down on my sofa and tuned in. Paramore have no reason to try and win people over, at such a young age, and with less albums under their belt than the average headliner, they are already a huge band pulling in impressive numbers. A fan service would be more than enough for them to go over well, and yet it felt like more than that.
From the moment the band charged on to the stage you could feel their energy. The three of them backed by a set of session players looked on top of the world, I can only imagine the feeling of walking out to a headline audience at Reading, it must be an infinite swirl of fear, trepidation, adulation, and jubilation. Like a washing machine full of mood rings. Hayley, who has apparently traded in here signature Orange hair for some rad Blue bangs, bounds about the stage with so much vigor, and joy that it’s hard not to feel a little happy for her, and the rest of the band accompany her well. It is the Hayley show, but that’s ok. She’s afforded the band a lot of their fame, and a massive female following that comes with being a band of this ilk. So why shouldn’t it be? If she wasn’t a real show-woman than it could be fair to argue that the rest of the band deserve more recognition, however she does have all the talents a front person needs, and because of this Paramore have gone from being a garage band to world beaters. In the past i’ve heard a lot of nonsense about how important the Paramore image is to the band, and yet I feel like the opposite is true, they just came across as you’re average rockers looking to make cool music. The stage also was surprisingly stripped down, some cool backdrops and a big digital spotlight helped to keep the show grounded.
By the middle of the set I found myself less in to it than at the beginning, as someone who has never listened to a Paramore record all the way through, I was of course going to struggle with a set that’s this long, it’s natural when you have only 4 albums that not every song is going to be a 10/10 banger, all of this though was sort of cast aside when they dropped Misery Business. It’s the song that I know this band for, and it would appear that the Reading audience felt the same way. The sing along was as good as any festival anthem I can remember in recent memory, and then there was a touching part where they picked one person out of the crowd to sing it. It’s a classic fan interaction thing that 30 Seconds To Mars have also been doing for a number of years, but it gets them over, and at least it’s not the tired formula of everyone jumping up off of the ground. The person they picked out, affectionately named ‘The Dinosaur’ -due to the Dinosaur onesie she seemed quite proud to own- also seemed to be really enjoying herself. I have always wondered what happens if they pull someone out of the crowd that really doesn’t know the words, that would be embarrassing.
What should have been a moment of pure adoration for Paramore, The Dinosaur, and the crowd was turned upside down on it’s head. The microphone she was handed wasn’t working, OK that’s a blunder, and a big one at that. It’s forgivable however, these things happen when bands are playing in quick succession. Hayley was spot on though and managed to get straight on it, saving what could arguably been a disaster, the main set appeared to come to an end, and all were happy. Or so the BBC would have you think, in short the BBC 3 show was edited to omit a number of sounds crippling errors that plagued the night. They did a good effort to save face for the band and the festival, but it’s still one of those things that can actually push a band back more than you realise.
You can judge a group in a infinite number of ways, it’s easy to say that you’re favourite band are all great guys when they are on a massive high, and everything is going right for them, but when faced with adversity peoples true colours shine. During Paramores set, all power went to the entire sound system. This is the catastrophe that butthurt meatheads stabbing needles into a small ginger voodoo doll, who hate the idea of a female front rock outfit playing a festival were hoping for. It’s about as fucked up as a 90 minute set can get outside of serious injury, or inclusion of Axl rose. Nearly all lesser bands would just call it quits there, it’s one show and they’ll probably bounce back, but what Paramore did earnt all my respect, and has forever changed my opinion of them. They came on stage, and decided to play an acoustic number from the front of stage, all huddled around the one mic that works. They had no reason to do that, they could have easily called it a day, picked up their fat paycheck and waited for a call back in a few years, but instead they refused to give up and made do in the circumstances. In a world so littered with huge musical egos, bands that don’t turn up on time and generally hold no regard for their fans, it such a breath of fresh air. Musically did it make the set any better? No of course not, and yet because of the determination to provide fans with what they came to see, I have nothing but good will for them.
The question i’m asking myself now is ‘Am I a Paramore fan?’ frankly i still don’t know, one set very rarely changes how I feel about a band, and when it does it’s because it was incredible (See Skrillex at Reading 2013) but at the same time there was more than enough to plant that seed in my head, no they wont ever be my favourite band, but after what i’ve seen tonight i’ll never have the ill will that I perhaps had when I was younger. Paramore have managed to massively change how I feel about them, not through sheer musicality, or showmanship, but with the nature in which they handled shit hitting the fan.
The only question that remains, which album should I listen to first?
When you are part of the largest counter culture movement of your day, you will always be subjected to the most intense scrutiny, no band from the 90’s were ogled more intensely than Nirvana. Seattle’s Grunge overlords started something that was so much bigger than themselves, that it would eventually collapse under it’s own weight after the tragic death of poster boy Kurt Cobain. What Nirvana left in their wake was three studio albums that provided an entire generation of the disenfranchised a platform. Grunge had died but what it stood for was still sounding louder than ever. Nirvana’s stellar initial effort Bleach was released 25 years ago, and the impact of that record as well as the two that followed is still being felt today. In Utero and especially Nevermind are cited as inspirations for a large number of artists from a huge cross section of music, and many of them choose to honour the classics contained within by covering them, be it in the studio or live on stage.
Below is a variety of these covers, some are straight up and choose to stick to the original formula, and some take an interesting view on a classic.
The Dillinger Escape Plan- Territorial Pissings
Territorial Pissings was Nirvana at their most ferocious, it’s snarling and angry, so when put into the hand of Planet Earths most intense band it morphs into another beast. To claim that a Nirvana song can be improved upon is pure sacrilege, but at the same time Greg and Co’s approach to the 3 chord classic takes a lot of what the original does and improve upon it. Famously used to end their set at 1992’s Reading Festival, before the inevitable massacre of stage that followed, it’s a musical manifestation of chaos. Dillingers attempt takes all these characteristics and dials them up to 10, they are a band that knows nothing but how to harness madness and turn it into music. Kerrang’s choice to have them to play on the Nevermind tribute album was inspired, and now we all have this cover to cherish.
Richard Cheese- Rape Me
To claim Richard Cheese’s cover of Rape Me is a tribute would be foolish. Cheese is of course a novelty act after all, albeit a novelty act with a tonne of talent, and the ability to choose a song and completely change the tone of it whilst maintaining the quality. He can take something dreary, battered and disgusting, then change it into a flashy, over the top and utterly ridiculous showpiece. He’s like the West Coast Customs of Lounge music. Cobain always said he wrote Rape Me to be purposefully blunt, after the meaning of Polly was completely lost on so many people, he wanted something that people could never misconstrue. It’s a song thats almost so over the top that it strays into the dangerous territory of being a parody of itself. For this reason it actually makes sense that Cheese would pick it for a cheery longue infusion. The first time I heard this cover it left me looking around the room feeling utterly bemused, for that reason it’s certainly a noteworthy cover.
Every Time I Die- Tourette’s
Every Time I Die are not unlike Dillinger in there execution and stage presence, they ooze masculinity and know how to lay waste to anything they get their hands on. Another song from the heavier end of the Grunge spectrum, Tourette’s can be interpreted in many ways, but the only thing for certain is that any two versions of the song are never the same. Cobain would often change the lyrics around, the song is about outbursts so it would of course make no sense to always stick to the same formula. If any band today stands for this message it’s ETID, they’re a band that perfectly encompasses the spirit of the song, and so it’s perfect that it’s found it’s way in to the New Yorkers set list. The cover is brutally heavy and utilizes the extra guitar to make it sound more pissed off than ever.
Muse- Lithium
Muse and Nirvana share more in common than most people would think. They are both 3 pieces characterised by a larger than life front-man, both bands received very little exposure with their first albums, and were promptly catapulted into the stratosphere with their second, and finally both bands at times had to deal with personal demons, in each case these demons defined them in different ways. For better or for worse, Kurt Cobain was not a singer, on the other hand Bellamy’s vocal range is colossal. Nirvana songs were not written to be sung by Pavaroti by any stretch of the imagination, but to hear them put in the hands of someone with an incredible singing voice is fantastic. Muse have always cited Nirvana as one of the bands that encouraged them to pursue music, and a quick Youtube will bring up a number of covers over the years that the Devon trio have reeled off. It’s perhaps Lithium that is their most soaring, it was the ultimate Nirvana sing-along track and fits the Muse aesthetic more than any other song in the Grunge catalogue.
2 Cellos- Smells Like Teen Spirit
Teen Spirit is the quint-essential Nirvana anthem, if mentioned to a casual outsider then chances are Smells Like Teen Spirit will be the first four words to leave their mouth. Everyone from Miley Cyrus to Paul Anka have covered it, with Anka’s especially being absolutely hilarious. No single genre has been spared in the ever increasing tidal wave of covers. This is where 2 Cello’s comes in. Trying to classify them isn’t easy, but effectively they are two incredibly talented Cello players smashing out some of the best Rock & Metal songs of all time. The reason I’ve picked this cover over any number of ridiculous attempts is that it is so original. It’s only when gritty music is played on a more delicate instrument that you realise how beautiful the composition can be. Teen Spirit is normally seen as a rallying anthem about youthful decadence, and yet when framed in a different light it sounds almost wounded. I was lucky enough to see this performed live as an opener for Elton John last year, I’ve never felt so conflicted in my whole life, part of me wanted to mosh, and the other half wanted to stand in quiet appreciation.
Rise Against- Sliver
Rise Against’s own form of politically charged, Punk Rock is special in itself, but the juxtaposition on this track is pretty funny. For a band that usually is all about getting their message across, deciding to throw down a cover of this Nirvana song was a interesting choice. Originally off of Incesticide, a collection of Covers and B-sides, Sliver is a song that’s purely about a young Cobains disdain for going to his Grandparents house when his parents were out. It does not have an ulterior motive, it is literally about crying and eating dinner there “Had to eat my dinner there, Mash Potatoes and stuff like that” It’s Kurt being refreshingly silly, and Rise Against seem to appreciate this. The cover itself is fun, much more musical and less emotionally raw than the original, it’s a decent effort at refreshing a lesser known classic.
Nirvana are obviously a band that inspired so many, I think it’s the grunge ideal of just picking up an instrument, playing with your friends and writing about what you like that so many people can relate to. They weren’t put together by a label, nor were they some incredible super group. They were simply a group of men who enjoyed making, playing and listening to music, and it translates in everything they do. The early demise of Kurt Cobain -and subsequently the band- left an insurmountable chasm in the musical world, It’s anyones guess what may of happened had that April tragedy not occurred, but true talent shines on, it’s always of utmost importance to honour what they gave us. Be that by wearing their T-Shirts, buying their albums, or covering their music.
The first time I saw Lady Gaga was in 2009, it was Glastonbury Festival and I took a chance on her based only off of the strength of Just Dance, and Poker Face. She played 3rd down on The Other Stage, behind the Ting TIngs no less (who have yet to achieve the same heights). I had no idea what to expect, but had heard about the berserk costumes, and that was enough for me, I was sold. From the moment the show began, to the moment it ended I was greeted with a circus of sound and sight. There was too much to see, and not enough time to see it. It was patently obvious that the size of the stage was holding her back, I thought anyone with the gall to make 4 costume changes in a 40 minute set is either an artistic genius, or a deranged madman, and fortunately the latter has been proven correct.
I had been in Vegas for 4 days before Gaga descended. Vegas is sin city by name, and sin city by nature, it stands head and shoulders above anywhere I have ever seen as the shadiest city on earth, drugs are plentiful and strip clubs are as common as corner shops, every vice flourishes and there is a constant sense that behind the facade is nothing but danger. Gaga herself is like a whirlwind with the ability to sweep up any city into a colourful, loud, and dazzling vortex. From the moment my last day in Vegas started Gaga fans were everywhere, and they could be spotted from a mile away. For many a Lady Gaga show is more than a simple concert, It’s a space where you can belong, regardless of gender, class, sexuality or any of the other metrics we are segregated by. This is all exhibited via the most spectacular costumes. Every single era of Gaga’s career is represented, from ladies dressed as the cover of The Fame and Artpop to men dressed as Judas and Heavy Metal Lovers. It’s less of an audience and more of a scrapbook of seven years of one womans message.
As time drew nearer the multi coloured rabble of Monsters took to the MGM Grand for the show. Upon walking through the gates and onto the arena floor I was greeted with the familiar warmth you only get from a Lady Gaga show, ArtRave is the name of the tour and you could feel it from the moment you enter, 30 minutes before even the first act was to take the stage the speakers were blasting out the most vicious of dance music. The entire space was already like a club floor with people moving and shaking from the ground to the top of the stands, clearly the more die hard fans had already flocked around one of 4 stage areas that would be used throughout the nights proceedings. The stage itself was awe inspiring, sprawling out from the main area to no less than 3 separate and smaller platforms. One of which had a piano moulded to look like something from the beginning of The Empire Strikes Back. A curtain obscured the main section of the stage, so not to spoil the surprise, and as 7:30 came, down went the lights, and a videotape played to signal the start of BabyMetal!
If you have never heard of BabyMetal, you have been missing out on the most polarising act this side of metal and J-pop, if you’re a fan of metal the instrumentals will be sure to tickle your fancy. It’s as brutal as the most heavy Meshuggah song, but the vocals… Well the vocals are the crooning of 3 teenage Japanese girls, in the most extremely J-poppy style imaginable, It’s like a ballet in Auschwitz. The video tape in the style of Star Wars displayed pictures of BabyMetal with Slayer and Metallica, and described how they were sent from some far flung planet to be heavy metal. Frankly it was so mental it was quite hard to discern any meaning from it, but before I knew it they band had made their way on stage and what followed was 30 minutes of brutal beatdowns, sweeping solos and oriental wailing. The biggest, and only song from the set I knew was of course Gimme Chocolate, to try and ascertain any meaning beyond face value, which is they want chocolate, but don’t want to put on any weight, would be a task. It’s exactly the message that should be spread in these times of great austerity, but jokes aside it’s easy to see why they have been booked to play on this tour, they are a band that has no natural fitting. A group of individuals who dared to be completely different. It fits perfectly with the Gaga ethos, judging by the reaction of the crowd they were loved by all, but in a bemused and confused sort of way. I personally thoroughly enjoyed it, there’s enough musicianship in the band to make them passable, and the aesthetic is so fucking barmy that you’ll never be left anything more than thoroughly entertained.
Second on was Lady Starlight, without Starlight you wouldn’t have Gaga, by this point she is a huge fan service to the Monsters who have been to multiple tours. This is immediately obvious the moment she walks out to a very vocal, adoring MGM Grand Arena. Dressed in a simple beige skirt suit she is the antithesis of the act she proceeds. Her job is simple, keep the crowd entertained before the main act starts, and this is done with an hour of minimalistic House music. She does a very good job of holding the massive audience using very little of the stage available to her, and that itself should be applauded. In truth no one is going away talking about how great Starlight was, it was just too minimalistic, but as a means to an end it really fits the bill. As soon as she leaves the stage, an atmosphere descends over the building. It’s as if the Queen is coming to the tea, you know, if the Queen was a 7ft giant Octopus that sings.
There’s always that moment at any gig where the lights go down before the person/people you came to see. It’s a feeling you only get at a concert, and there’s no way to describe it accurately. Regardless of whether it’s Pop, Metal, Hip Hop or any of the other colours of the musical rainbow, it always incurs the same reaction from anyone in attendance. The wall of noise in this case was ineffable, the whirlwind that had swept up Vegas was here, and she was ready to put on a performance. Even for Gaga, who has one of the most devoted fan basses of any touring artist today, launching immediately into 5 songs off of your new album is a brave move. Thats exactly what she did however, and the reaction was of course huge, opener Artpop got the biggest pop of the gaggle of opening songs, but the start of Just Dance certainly prompted the biggest reaction of the night so far. If you thought using new songs first was a bold choice, than the idea that she would take the three songs most instrumental in launching her career and mash them up in to a mix would be surely inconceivable. Smashing Just Dance/ Poker Face/ Telephone in about 5 minutes is an experience. The amount of singles sold between just those 3 songs is substantial, and yet they’re cast aside in favour of newer more meaningful material, in a time where label and sponsor pressure would push an artist to put their strongest foot first I salute her for sticking to her guns.
A solo acoustic version of Born This Way, as well as a solo performance of Dope were my personal highlights of the sets. Both songs, especially the former when framed in this way are incredible pieces of music, it goes to show that behind all the pantomime and pomp lies one woman with the most incredible and powerful voice. Judas and Alejandro also cause a near frenzy, in a night so full of hit singles it never ceased to amaze me just how much of a massive reaction each and every individual song got.
It simply wouldn’t be a Lady Gaga show if it didn’t have the most ludicrous outfits imaginable. The Sea Shell bikini with the Acoustic Flying V was quite neutered in its approach, whereas the Anime/Rave crossover outfit was a sight to behold. All in all there was 8 costumes over the course of the 90 minute set, each one as ridiculous as the next. The simple Chrome Dress was of course complimented with a Sea-horse shaped Keytar, and the startlingly elaborate Octopus outfit came tandem with a giant hand shaped throne which would ascend into the air, so that everyone could catch a glimpse of the madness. The final costume change interestingly enough came on stage, Gaga ripped off her wig, in what I assumed was some sort of a understandable breakdown, but actually turned out to be just another calculated move in a perfectly choreographed show. She then turned round and did her last change on stage. It was a smart idea and demonstrated to everyone just how much energy and planning goes into each and every aspect of this massive show.
Throughout the show she took time to interact with the fans, hoisting into the air one of a number of Pride flags that adorned the arena, as well as taking time to proudly display one of a number of gifts passed on to stage, including and but not limited to a blow up doll, Go figure. One of the most touching and natural moments of the show came towards the end when she plucked a letter from a fan in the crowd, and then proceeded to read it out on stage. The letter described how the writer had a hard time coming out and how the influence of Born This Way helped him, something that was probably ture of a number of the people in attendance that night, it also went on to describe how much he wanted to sit and drink tea with Gaga, an offer she accepted for after the show. What took me surprise, was how out of breath she was when addressing the crowd between songs, it should come as no surprise seeing how intense the performance is, the ability to sing and dance is not something we are born with, it take serious training, but when stars like Gaga and Beyonce make it seem so effortless it’s easy to forget how physically fit they have to be.
The end of the show was brought around with Bad Romance, Applause, Swine and for an encore, Gypsy. All four songs were expectedly brilliant with Applause and Bad Romance in particular being highlights of the more vibrant parts of the set, and as quickly as it had began, the set had ended. It left me with a sense of wonderment, and also the a feeling of fulfillment. It was oddly like seeing someone who you’ve followed for a number of years come full circle. This wasn’t a muddy second stage at a festival, this was her own space in which she has a chance to innovate and captivate, and this is exactly what she had done. It was time for the massive crowd that had all descended for one reason to disperse, safe in the knowledge that they had got their moneys worth. Mount Gaga had erupted, leaving a slain MGM Grand Garden Arena in her wake.
When many people look back over the history of Slipknot, 2014 will be seen as the year they made the largest and most radical change in their history, and that is making a record with out the original nine. The whole band has been centered on the idea of the 9 since its first major release, and now the sanctity of that bond has been broken. The band, and the fans have had time to come to terms with Pauls death, and stand in Bassist Donnie Steele has been doing a great job, even if it has been behind the scenes, and off of stage. What many will find peculiar however is the message that appeared earlier this year, and the revelation that Joey had quit the band. The idea of a Slipknot without Joey to many seemed unimaginable. Sort of like The Simpsons without Homer, or America without questionable gun laws. Immediately we asked who will replace him, and it blew up the internet in a fashion ironically comparable to a Jordison blast beat. Months passed and a few creepy teasers later we were hit with The Negative One.
The Knots new song is a step in the right direction. In my opinion it is a fantastic blend of Iowa and Vol. 3 material, and comparisons to Heretic Anthem immediately jumped in too my head. As a kid growing up in England, Vol.3 was the first Slipknot record I bought, and so it has a big place in my heart, so hearing this song filled me with a familiar warmth. It is fair to say however the drums do sound noticeably different on this song to everything that really came before it. Not just on a technical level, but also the way they are mixed in to the track. This begs the question, Who the hell is drumming for Slipknot?
Chris Adler
Chris Adler is arguably one of the best drummers in Metal at this time, after drumming in Lamb Of God for the last 14 years he has risen through the ranks and played shows all around the world. Stylistically he is a good fit for Slipknot, and the drums (especially the snare) sound very similar listening too The Negative One and Lamb Of God. With LoG taking time out for a while after finishing their last tour it is not inconceivable that in his down time he would keep on top of his game, and take some time to drum on what’s sure to be the biggest album in metal 2014/5. Would he stay with Slipknot, or go on tour with them? Almost certainly not, after everything the band went through with Randy last year it wouldn’t make any sense, and currently Lamb Of God are on an otherworldly upswing. To uproot and join Slipknot would be madness, but weirder things have happened this year.
Dave Lombardo
The former Slayer sticksman has been left with some spare time on his hands since walking out on Slayer for a second time last year, it’s not unthinkable that Slipknot would want to take someone up with a back catalogue that includes albums like ‘Reign In Blood’ and ‘Seasons In The Abyss’. Unquestionably Dave has all the ability to lay down some killer tracks for any record, Slipknot included, and his knowledge and ability to revolutionise would be valued by all. However Dave is some what of an elder statesman compared to the rest of the band, and Slayer were always a balls to the wall, straight up in your face kind of metal outfit. Slipknot however rely on a show, theatrics and an atmosphere in everything they do. Could you see Mr Lombardo in a mask and jumpsuit? Probably not, this doesn’t necessarily mean he couldn’t have just done the recording leaving a younger and fresher drummer to go on tour with The Knot…
Krimh
Krimh isn’t the most recognisable name in mainstream metal, his work with Decapitated, whilst stellar has not catapulted him in to a household name like a lot of the people on this list. However when he published videos of himself laying down both Sic and People = Shit the whole internet got talking. It’s not inconceivable that these videos would have ended up on the desks of Corey Or Clown (because international rock stars have desks, sacrilege) For anyone that hasn’t seen the video below, he clearly has some of the harder tracks nailed, and if you have heard his work in decapitated, you’d know that he is no pushover behind the kit. His youth would also work in his favour, Slipknot is a physically and emotionally demanding outfit and the fact that he had the presence of mind to upload an audition tape when the rest of the world was sat around scratching there head could prove to really work in In his favour.
Chris or Clown
This one is perhaps less serious than the others, but come one wouldn’t it be fantastic. It’s a running joke amongst me and some friends that if you show one of the great unwashed a Slipknot live video they will always point out Clown and ask “What the fuck does he do?” To an outside eye it does look like he just fucks around and occasionally hits a keg with bat. How funny would it be for Clown or even Chris to stand up in Slipknots time of need and fill in drums for the greater good, casting a side their stellar work in the art of chaos to unify the band in there time of great adversity. Clowns first steps in to Slipknot found him behind the kit so why not reassume this position, who knows, we may all like it. Jokes aside Clowns influence on Slipknot has always been massive, musically and stylistically so having him take a bigger role would almost certainly have a positive affect on the band.
Joey Jordison
It’s a long shot… It’s a real fucking longshot, but who’s to say it isn’t Joey. Considering how much of a shock this news was initially, and the vague nature of it all. At no point has anyone ever been able to come forward and clear anything up on either side. Imagine if as the curtain dropped on their first show back it was one of the most beloved members behind the kit, doing his thing and still shredding with the Knot. The crowd whilst half bemused would almost certainly explode. Weirder publicity stunts have happened, but perhaps this is just me being hopeful.
In the UK the last week of August is always one tinged with sadness, Summer is coming to an end, the days are noticeably shorter, and the end of the holidays is fast approaching. The only solace is the promise of one final public holiday to serve as a final goodbye before the inevitable 9 months of grey skies, rain and disappointment. Many of us choose every year to make the pilgrimage to Reading or Leeds for five days of dirty festival fun. Reading and Leeds have branched out in the last 10 years from it’s roots as a straight up Punk/Rock festival to a more broad audience with stages dedicated to Urban and Dance music, as well as the usual Indie and Metal stages. These days there’s no one that would look truly out of place at Reading. The audience is slightly younger, perhaps not as young as the Isle Of Wight however, and the atmosphere isn’t as harmonious as some of the more age friendly festivals, but what you do get is true passion and a convergence of tens of thousands of like minded music fans. With such a diverse lineup containing acts from all four corners of the musical landscape, i’ve decided to narrow it down to some that have every chance of stealing the weekend.
Friday
The start of a festival is really important, first impression are everything after all and it can set a tone that will carry across the whole weekend. If you want you’re festival to start at 1000kmph I seriously suggest seeing Hacktivist open the main stage. I’ve written about them before and they are without a doubt one of the best new bands on the scene today, their own brand of Djent/Grime crossover is so uncompromising it will taste like a crate of Red Bull at 11AM. Their show is tight as any band around today and their sound is as mighty as it is different. Also worth sticking around for is there cover of Nigga’s In Paris which last year caused absolute pandemonium wall to wall. If you like Metal, Grime, or Hip Hop they will be the perfect start to your weekend. Straight after Hacktivist comes Crossfaith AKA everyones favourite Japanese Electro Metal fusion madheads. OK admittedly they aren’t known as that at all, but they do pack the best live show of the last 5 years. For a band in it’s relative infancy they really know how to whip a crowd up into an absolute frenzy. Anyone around for their Sunday afternoon set last year will tell you the place took off. Its Metal, it’s heavy and it has a very electronic edge. Similar to Hacktivist it’s a sound you may not have heard before and thats what makes it so fresh and exciting. There will be Circle Pits, Walls of Deaths and Crowdsurfing so make sure you get up early and catch the spectacle.
The last band from the Main Stage i’m rooting for on Friday will be Enter Shikari, the Hatfield Quintet are Reading and Leeds most trusted and reliable booking. Having played every year since 2010 in one form or another, they know how to put on a show. The music speaks for itself and at times can be divisive, but the message is one of unity and this is evident throughout the set. Every year Shikari make an effort to break their own record for most amount of crowd surfers during a song, and regardless of whether they succeed, it is one of the most awe inspiring sights you will see at a festival. Set closer ZZZonked is nothing short of bonkers, whipping the crowd into a frenzy only comparable to seeing a Dog in the playground. As far as stage presence goes, they might be the best you’ll see all weekend. If Shikari are the antithesis of Polished and professional, The Fat White Family are the polar opposite, recently banned from playing Somerset House with Franz Ferdinand for ‘Not fitting the ethos’ they have been labelled the most dangerous band touring today. Expect gut wrenching sludgy riffs and a similar stage show. Getting naked is the name of the game and stopping there would be palatable for most, but the smearing of shit might get a bit much for some, and then theres masturbating on stage. They will seem to some as a love letter to G.G Allin the much troubled Punk maestro, but look beyond the shock value and there is genuine songwriting talent, albeit somewhat obscured by the flying pigs heads.
Lastly on the Alternative Stage is Bill Bailey alright, he is a comedian but don’t let that fool you. Bill Bailey is an incredible multi-instrumentalist and has a musical mind that many would kill for. His own sideways look on the music today is second to none. If you’ve never seen a Bill Bailey comedy show, he has been known to play Scarborough Fair in the style of Rammstein. If that’s not enough, he also drops the BBC news theme in the style of an apocalyptic rave. It will be funny, but with a musical edge, a perfect break and a chance to do something different with your festival.
Saturday
Playing second on the Main Stage on Saturday morning is Pulled Apart By Horses the Leeds quintet are the perfect cure for the previous nights ill informed campsite decisions packing an early morning punch, expect it to be audaciously loud, and completely bonkers. Especially if you are in Leeds where the band are hometown favourites. One to watch, and my pick to climb up the festival bill in coming years.
The Hives are also playing the same stage Saturday afternoon. Very few bands that weekend will have songs that even come close to the madness that Tick, Tick, Boom and Hate To Say I Told You So will bring. It’s as if theY found the necronomicon on how to write a song for a festival. Having seen them at both Download and Reading The Hives are an effortless activity in how to bring a set packed with hits, blow minds and then leave.
One of the more obvious acts to see at the weekend is Nero, much maligned in some circles there’s few people that can argue that Nero bring universally enjoyable music. They’ve played sets all around the world and when they descend upon Reading and Leeds they will bring all that experience to deliver 90 minutes of fast paced electronic fun. Anyone who saw Skrillex last year will tell you that Dance music very much has a place at the top of the bigger stages.
Going completely in a different direction, playing The Pit stage is The Hell. The anonymous Metal band have been causing a stir in the world of Heavy music thanks to their special brew of heavier than heavy metal, and in your face songwriting style. ‘It’s The Mother Fucking Hell You Dick’ and ‘Everyone Dies’ aren’t your classic festival anthem, but damn they sound fresh and frankly they should be. Expect pits, crowd surfing and Bandanna clad madness, why not add an extra kick to the set by taking a drink every time someone swears?
While She Sleeps are back at Reading and Leeds after what was unanimously agreed to be one of the best opening sets Reading has ever seen last year. Whilst perhaps not the biggest band from Leicester to be playing that day WSS will still bring their own blend of anthemic metal to The Pit. After seeing them lay absolute waste to the main stage at 11AM on Friday morning last year, lord only knows what they are going to do in front of a rowdy crowd on a Saturday night. While She Sleeps has every chance of being the band to beat.
I couldn’t talk about the Saturday this year without mentioning Beardyman playing early on alternative stage, expect him to absolutely pack out the tent. Beardyman brings so little to his show, and yet he brings so much. For the uninitiated he is a beatboxer that uses a loop station to create fully expansive, and utterly mesmerizing songs. On top of this he is one of the funniest acts on the Alternative stage bill, with his unique view of the music world and all this whilst improvising on the spot. If not for the clear musical prowess, go just for the spectacle of seeing thousands dancing to a man making funny noises into a microphone.
The last band that deserves a mention on Saturday is Royal Blood. Whether or not you believe the hype is your choice. Frankly their ascension has been incredible, rising from up and coming band to Radio 1 favourites in no time at all. After proving themselves in front of a monolithic crowd at Glastonbury it would seem that they know how to live up to the comparisons that would have crushed many a lesser band. The stage is set and if Royal Blood are to take this summer and make it their own, Reading and Leeds will prove to be a larger of the many hurdles they will have to overcome.
Sunday
Lets face it, by Sunday you look like shit, smell like shit, and feel like shit. Even if you’ve stopped giving a shit, you need a shit, and that presents it’s own series of problems. Why not alleviate all this by going to see Papa Roach on the mainstage. I know what you’re thinking Papa Roach?! As in Papa Roach from 2001 who did Last Resort. Yes that’s exactly who, for what many people don’t realise about them is that they actually are a very good festival band. You might not know many of the songs but my god you will think you do. A true Beer drinkers band expect the most classic festival fun. Just when you think that you’re done with Papa Roach the ring of “CUT MY LIFE IN TWO PIECES, THIS IS MY LAST RESORT” will ring across the site and for 4 minutes you will be doing backflips.
Disclosure are heading up the second stage on Sunday, as a way to close out your festival they are the perfect act. The Lawrence brothers have been smashing out hit after hit in the last couple of years and their live show is the antithesis of this. Those who saw their Glastonbury set will tell you that their show is a rotating belt of guests slots, with a light show to match and a back catalogue of songs which every last person will be able to throw mad shapes too it’s going to be a perfectly executed spectacle.
Playing The Pit earlier on Sunday are Baby Godzilla, they are probably not a band you know much about, yet. What Baby Godzilla bring is one of the most furious adrenaline fueled sets, night in night out. No two sets are ever the same when every single member throws themselves around the stage with no concern for their own health. We’ve all seen singers jump in to the crowd, some of us have even seen guitars played from inside a pit. Baby Godzilla play drums from in the pit. This is all fine, but really means nothing if the songs don’t back it up, fortunately the songs are equally as ferocious, like a big old kick in the balls. Of everyone playing Sunday they are the one band I beg you do not miss.
If Baby Godzilla are the young fresh upstarts of the chaotic live show circuit Every Time I Die are the grizzled veterans. Whilst they might not throw themselves around the stage like a ballerina in a minefield, the fans do. Last time I saw them at Reading they opened up a pit that was only a few feet shy of being the circumference of the tent, and you could see they clearly loved it. The songs are written to be played live, fast and totally uncompromising, they are the perfect accompaniment to the reactions they invoke in a festival crowd. There just isn’t enough goodwill for them. At a time when Metallica at Glastonbury is the talking point of the metal world it’s good to see a band that is able to prove that it’s not all about being at the top. Sometimes you just have to smash a 40 minute set and fuck off.
Reading will always have a special place in my heart, it gives you just enough of everything, and yet still has the power to leave you wanting more. There’s something for everyone on the lineup and sometimes it’s best not to plant yourself in front of the mainstage. Adventure out to the smaller things and you might find the next headliner, or a maniac shouting into a loop station.
I’ve never had a day ticket for a festival, it always seemed like and odd concept to me. Why only go for a day, surely a festival is all about the entire experience, the dirty campsites, shit toilets, and stranger than fiction people you meet along the way. In the past i’ve always looked at day ticket holders like outsiders. Clean little bastions of the real world who just don’t understand. They didn’t get to see ‘Parky’ do a forward flip into the pool of mud before fighting another drunk and pissing himself last night. It’s like they’ve missed all the best parts. This is why the Saturday of this years Isle Of Wight festival was a first for me.
No part of me could justify going for a whole weekend two weeks before Glastonbury, but the idea of missing the first Red Hot Chili Peppers UK festival in seven years was too much to deal with. Ok so when they did Reading in 2007 it was a bit of a disaster, they had loads of issues with sound, and it really crippled what would have otherwise been a stellar performance, but thats not going to stop me seeing one of the most important bands of my childhood. That’s the beautiful thing about RHCP they are a band that seems to resonate with everyone. Their start as acid laden funk maestros, was adventurous and different but easily palatable, and now they are making gargantuan stadium rock songs. It’s an entirely different direction for the Rock and Roll Hall of Famers but what would you expect from a band thats been at the forefront of Rock for well over 30 years. Most of my friends who are in there early twenties grew up at a time when ‘Blood Sugar Sex Magik’ ‘Californication’ and ‘By The Way’ were massive. The music videos were trippy, and different from everything else you would see, and they did songs called Suck My Kiss which as a 12 year old is about the naughtiest thing imaginable.
The Isle Of Wight festival is a funny little beast, it’s clearly one of the biggest in the UK stature wise, and yet when you arrive there having been to Reading or Glastonbury, it seems really small, the kind of place where you know the bloke on the gate taking your tickets by name if you’ve been 2 or 3 years in a row. Upon getting in we went for an explore and immediately noticed a wealth of mini stages with a litany of different smaller acts. It’s a nice touch because no one is going pay £200 to see an underground 4 piece rockabilly band, but at the same time it offers something different for someone who’s only come for a few choice acts. The main acts for the day that I wanted to see were twofold, The Specials and RHCP. Everything else along the way would be a surprise.
Firstly came Dappy (who came on late) no doubt because all he could hear from his dressing room was a chorus of loud booing. The cameras of course encouraging this by zooming in on a sign that read ‘Fuck Dappy’. Fair enough, by the sounds of it the first 5 or 6 rows of girls did indeed want to ‘Fuck Dappy’ so as soon as he came on stage ‘Mr Fuck Dappy sign’ decided to sheepishly walk off. It seemed like half of the fairly sizeable crowd were genuinely quite excited to see him, whilst the other half were there out of pure morbid curiosity. What I couldn’t get past was the backpack Dappy was wearing, like an actual backpack you would take to school, this wasn’t the wisest choice from a man who is School Boy esque in size. The question of whether the aforementioned back pack was a style choice or purely for practical reasons was answered swiftly by the genius line “Who wants some goodies from my backpack” At this point it all got a bit much and I decided rather than cramping the style of all the Dappy fans I would continue to drink. It was only 4 o’ clock and there was another 5 hours until the main event. Only later did i realise that actually he made a similar choice and fucked off a song later. A victory for crudely written cardboard signs everywhere.
Next up (After a few little drinks to pass the time) was Cyril Hahn and Duke Dumont. We arrived at the tent with a decent amount of time to spare and the Kiss.FM DJs were doing their thing, but there was larger conundrums afoot. Upon looking around I realised that the average age of the people there was about 14. This isn’t an over exaggeration, one boy at the front could have been no older than 12. It was madness, I don’t know what annoyed me more, the fact he was there, or the fact he was quite patently cooler than me. I don’t know if you’ve ever seen a group of preteens at a Cyril Hahn show, but it’s like the school disco, if the school disco didn’t have any adult supervision. Cyril himself did nothing for me, the whole thing moulded in to one, and not in a good way neither. I never felt an impulsive need to dance. It all just seemed to exist in the background. I’m reliably informed that previous sets my friends have seen were better, so god knows what was going on that day. Duke Dumont however was the opposite, having gone in with no expectations it really blew me away, I didn’t know any of the songs, but I had a really fucking good time dancing. Thats all I personally ask for in a DJ, just something I can really get behind and bounce too. After the tedium of the last 45 minutes it was the perfect warm up for what came next.
There was a palpable air of excitement just before The Specials took to the stage, it’s like queueing for a really good nightclub, albeit one that’s well expensive, but the music is really exquisite. The Specials themselves sounded as tight as any other time i’ve seen them. They reek of effortlessness, the usual hits were respun, as frankly a band that garners their respect deserves to play whatever they want. ‘Doesn’t make it alright’ was followed by Lynval Golding proclaiming that voting UKIP doesn’t make it alright. A sentiment probably lost on the obtuse number of teenagers there. ‘Ghost Town’ went down like the wispy ska classic it is, and ‘Too Much Too Young’ was met with unified skanking across the entire field. On the eve of England’s first 2014 world cup game, the encouragement of a ‘Fuck Luis Suarez’ chant did absolutely nothing to hurt their untouchable profile either. You know what you are getting when you go to a Specials show and this was know different, its fun, and silly, but with enough of a political edge to make you think. The sort of thing music that is the perfect accompaniment for the nights headliners.
There is nothing I can say about The Red Hot Chilli Peppers that hasn’t been said a thousand times. They’ve been a constant presence in mainstream rock for well over 20 years, earning a name for themselves with their creative live shows, solid albums, and onstage personalities. This is why it’s no surprise to say that on the night they were very very good. Nothing that will go down in history as the best concert ever, but a very solid headline booking. The intro jams were as funky as ever, and they immediately launched into Cant Stop, a song which many can agree is an absolute festival belter, instantly you could see they had the whole crowd in the palms of there hands. They sounded good, but definitely lacked John Frusciante. Josh is good, but has a tendency to play all the right notes, it’s not something you come to expect from the Chilis and it does take away some of the excitement. John was wild and could take you on a ride, it gave the band an edge that they have slowly lost over the last decade. The Red Hot Chilli Peppers clashing with England VS Italy seemed oddly appropriate as they were both things that were probably better in the 80’s
The usual onstage shenanigans were present, Flea opened up with an improv Trumpet solo, the kind that screams HARD DRUGS, he also announced that him and Chad were gay lovers. The more you know! The set wasn’t too heavy on ‘I’m With You’ tunes which suited everyone, and the songs they did play ‘Ethiopia’ and ‘Rain Dance Maggie’ are both more than passable ‘Blood Sugar Sex Magik’ material still sounded absolutely glorious and the songs off of it will always be my highlight. The only let down of the set was that due to time restraints they didn’t get a chance too play four songs. Two of these omitted songs were ‘Under The Bridge’ and ‘Higher Ground’ the former of which may be one of the most important songs to me whilst growing up. It was the song that took me from being someone who listens to music when its on, to actively seeking out new music to fall in love with. At this point I don’t know why they came on late, or why they weren’t allowed to continue, but it took the shine off of what was a fantastic set from a band that will always be regarded as one of the best in their heyday.
When it’s all said and done, seeing RHCP was something to cross off of the bucket list, and now I have. Given the choice between seeing them again, or seeing something fresh and exciting, I would always pick the latter. There is an air of tiredness about them thats hard to miss, but the songs are so massive you can never count them out. They earned their right to be where they are with songs like ‘Give It Away’ and ‘Around The World’ and there is still a generation of kids who are yet to fall in love with them. They are important for music, as they have the power to turn casual fans into die hards. That is something that you can never take away.
Sex, Drugs and Rock and Roll. It’s the endless cliché used to describe many a “Big nights out” in your local boozer, that inevitably ends in nothing but bad decisions, a sick headache and kebab laden breath. The relationship between Drugs and Rock Music however runs much deeper, and it’s effects have always been always monumental in shaping the landscape of not just bands, but entire Genre’s. Whilst in the world of pop, many acts will go out of their way to distance themselves from the debauched lifestyles of their rock cousins, in so many other walks of music it is positively encouraged. Genre’s such as Stoner Rock, and Acid house are not tongue in cheek, they are very literal in their interpretation of how the music chooses to exist, but is this relationship between Drugs and Music something to be celebrated as many would have us believe, or is it something that should be lambasted as childish?
The 60’s may be the decade that brought us The Beatles, a World Cup Win, Impossibly cool fashion and Flower Power, but it is also the first occasion in which drugs became a natural part of our culture. It’s synonymous with the swinging 60’s, and no one person sums up this time of patent Hippy-ism more than Jimi Hendrix. He was the Poster Boy for the free love era, and rightly so. His infectious riffs coupled with his iconic dress sense and his philosophy on life all come together to create the perfect flag bearer for a scary yet revolutionary time in modern human history. Hendrixs relationship with drugs was as varied as it was intense. No song better summarises this icons ideals than Purple Haze.
Ironically Hendrix always maintained this song was not about drugs, and was in fact about a dream he had in which he was walking underwater engulfed in, funnily enough, A Purple Haze. The dream was a traumatic experience and only his faith was able to save him. It is beautiful and very well thought out, but does sound like something that someone on LSD would say. The lyrics very vividly describe what many would interpret as an Acid trip. “Don’t know if i’m coming up or down” That says it all really.
Hendrix never openly took the time to glorify drugs, but it was always very prevalent in everything he did. From his fashion choices to the southern drawl that always appeared to be a step slower than everyone around him. The man was like a bad trip with incredible musical prowess. Kathy Etchingham, A friend of Hendrix, may of best summed up why Jimi relied on drugs to the degree he did, she claims that through his music he tried to interpret the things he would experience whilst in the most intense drug induced hallucinations, but as they had no base in the real world, they became almost impossible to understand. A beautiful sentiment that one could argue goes some of the way to explaining how someone could so easily play fast and loose with their life. It comes as no surprise to many that his demons eventually caught up to him, and on September 18th, 1970 he died with a mixture of drugs and alcohol in his system. It was an incredibly sad, yet fitting end for such an icon. Prolific in so many ways, but most importantly for the music he created. Would a tee total Hendrix ever of made it as far as he did? We’ll never know, his genius however is unquestionable, and no one can deny that what he did with a guitar still influences many people today, and possibly forever.
As the 60’s gave way to the 70’s peace and love fell out of favor, and the birth of heavy metal was brought along by four men from the grim north. Black Sabbath moved the goalposts for what a band could do. Using horror and darkness in their arsenal, they spoke to the alienated youth and gave them a voice. Unsurprisingly to anyone who knows the first thing about Sabbath, they also have a storied existence with narcotics, hell the first story that most people think of when they hear the name Ozzy Osbourne is the time he bit the head off of a Bat, subsequently having to go to the hospital to be treated for Rabies, and it doesn’t take a genius to realize that those are not the actions of a sober man. Opposed to Hendrix, who at times found it difficult and perhaps didn’t chose to glorify them, Sabbath bloody loved them. Point in case, Sweet Leaf.
From the men who many argue created Heavy Metal comes the song that just as many claim created Stoner Rock, the opening of the song is a loop of Tony Iommi coughing from a joint he was smoking. The song is a love letter to the worlds most readily available (currently) illegal drug. The slow sludgy riff was less sinister than a lot of their previous work, and much more rosy. Sweet leaf T-Shirts, with a massive Cannabis leaf and the famous Sabbath logo have been available as late as 2012, showing testament to the staying power of the song and what it represents.
Black Sabbath are a band with enough stories that involve being high as a kite to fill a lifetime, and it’s a wonder that 40 years later, all the members are here to tell the tale. In recent years Ozzy Osbourne has done his best to try and sober up, but in the world of Metal where temptation greets you at every corner, it is never that easy, Osbourne relapsed in the early part of 2013, which is staggering when you consider he is a 65 year old man, and not just a kid from Birmingham trying to find his voice. In his own words – Alcoholism and Drug addiction are a sickness that should be feared. What would 1970 Osbourne would make of this is anyone’s guess, however it is undeniable that the pastime he so graciously loved in his youth eventually came back to be his biggest enemy in later life.
The all encompassing live fast, die young, come whatever may, ho hum, we are really rock and roll attitude of the previous decades was polarized in the 80’s with the beginning of the Hardcore Punk movement. Suddenly madness ensued and bands like Minor Threat were encouraging their fans to not only abstain from drugs, but alcohol and sex. Surely this was blasphemy in the church of Satan? Well fortunately a group of young upstarts from Los Angeles under the name of Motley Crue came to save the day. Suddenly there was a rift in the world of Rock. On one side you had the ultra glam, in your face and brightly coloured party bands going toe to toe with the Politically infused, visceral realists with the faithful X’s emblazoned across their hands, not just as a sign of membership, but as a badge of honour.
The hedonistic lifestyles of Crue are well documented. Every night was just another party, another faceless woman, and another hit. One such night put the band on the edge of tragedy, when bassist Nikki Sixx was pronounced dead in Hospital having overdosed on enough Cocaine to sink Colombia. It turns out however, much like Fawkes from Harry Potter but with a bit of a blow, he was revived, his life saved by an EMT with two shots of adrenaline injected directly into his heart. A life changing experience like dying would of course change your perspective on life and you would immediately give up the narcotics right? Nah, not Nikki, he left the hospital, got a cab and went straight back to another party. No time like the present right?
In recent years it seems that Crue have for the most part given up their crazy lifestyles. Sure there was that Tommy Lee sex tape with Pam Anderson, before she did all the plastic surgery, but that’s forgivable. The toll that these men have put on there lives must be substantial, but the message they leave behind is one of rebellion, one which encourages everyone to have a great time, and one which teaches us to live every moment because life is too short (Yolo). Isn’t it ironic?
Whilst this all sounds incredibly fun and equally dangerous, it had its detractors. On the other side stood Ian MacKaye and Minor Threat who took a completely different approach to the Rock and Roll lifestyle. Being around so much decadence has its down sides, and after seeing one too many friends crumble before his eyes from addiction, he chose to abstain from any substances that could control him. At first this personal conquest was nothing more than a way to broaden his own mind, but it started to catch on. Suddenly there was an uprising of disengaged youth whose ideals matched perfectly what Minor Threat were preaching. This worked perfectly in tandem with bands such as Black Flag, who’s enemies were not substance abuse, but in fact the abuse of authority. The anti-establishment roots of the Sex Pistols mixed with the self betterment movement of straight edge punk combined perfectly to create a subculture that knew what it wanted, and was willing to fight to get it.
The most obvious example of a song putting forth MacKayes ideals is strangely enough named “Straight Edge”
“I’m a person just like you,
but i’ve got better things to do,
then sit around and fuck my head,
hang out with the living dead”
Admittedly it does come across as a tad preachy, but that’s what the people want, a fearless leader who’s not afraid to say what so many before them have been unable to. The straight edge society had been born, and it’s a testament to the strength of it’s roots that it still exists today, some 20 years later. Celebrities from Odd Futures perennial leader – and full time trouble maker – Tyler The Creator, all the way through to Metallica overlord and all round top guy – James Hetfield – are proudly flying the flag.
In music there seems to be two schools of thought. One is the ‘let’s not talk about drugs, but we will take shit loads of them and just hope no one notices’ and then there is the, ‘lets take shit loads and talk about them all the time and have lots of great fun’. System Of A Down are a band that quite comfortable fit into the second category. Cast your mind back to the scene in Wolf Of Wall Street, where after being sober for a few years, Jordin Belfort goes a bit doo-lalli and pulls a pillow case of Cocaine out of his couch, then proceeds to motorboat it. That scene is a beautiful visual representation of the early days of SOAD. Daron Malakian is possibly the best example of this, when stood next to him, its hard to tell if Serj or Shavo are sober, or just not on quite as much Acid.
They’re a difficult band to try and really nail down their views, whilst frequently mentioning drugs in all their songs, they are only ever used as a means to an end for their wider agenda. War. This makes it difficult to truly dictate what their opinions are, as a band they have appeared in High Times more than once, but when you’re System Of A Down, its pretty much a given that you have hung out with some trees at some point in your life.
Now if I could take off my amateur blogger hat for a moment, and put on my detective hat, I’ll break down some SOAD lyrics, in an effort to work out the Armenians thoughts on narcotics. The obvious song to look at would have to be “This Cocaine Makes Me Feel Like I’m On This Song”
“Gonorrhea gorgonzola
Gonorrhea gorgonzola
Single files of clean feedings”
Alright, that’s not really helped at all, but it is worth mentioning as frankly it’s hilarious. Now to get things back on track, the SOAD of 2013, whilst still incredibly capable of putting on a mind blowing show, are not as energetic, or frankly as balmy as the SOAD of the 90’s. Can this be attributed purely to drugs? Only they can truly answer that, but considering the often convoluted nature of their stance, that’s not likely to happen. Could it purely be down to the fact that they are now family men, or a lot older? All possibilities, but the signs seem to point towards a more sober, and less Wolf Of Wall Street, System Of A Down. Except Daron, he fucking loves Cocaine.
Another band that came along in the 90’s, riding in to the music scene inside of a trojan horse made entirely from Valium is NoFx. True punk in it’s most sincere form, they have made clear from a very early stage, they love drugs and take a lot of them too. Lead singer, Bassist and Punk king ‘Fat Mike’ was recently asked in a Reddit AMA how he decides his setlists. A good question when you consider the almost random nature of a NoFx show, his answer? “I usually take a valium and have a few vodka drinks and I write a setlist about an hour before the show. Then Hefe and Melvin come look at it and practice the songs that we haven’t played in a while. The drunker I get the more obscure songs I put in.” It’s this kind of unwavering honesty that people appreciate in modern punk.
The thing about NoFx that should be admired is, despite their very frank depictions of everything drug related, they advocate ‘handling your high’. Sure snort loads of Cocaine, snort it every day if you must, but as soon as it starts to effect your life for in a negative manner, you give it up. My first NoFx show was in 2012, and I will always remember how strange it was. The reason being that they had only been awake for about 30 minutes before coming on. “Hey guys, we only just got up, we haven’t even had any drugs yet”, Fat Mike proudly proclaimed to the Donnington faithfuls. It was a brief and insightful glimpse into what it means to be a modern day rockstar.
Despite this irreverent, almost irresponsible behaviour, it’s not like they don’t realise how badly things can spiral out of control. Doornails is a tender song in a sea of songs about ruddy politicians and other punk things. It’s a eulogy for their many friends who have all died, sadly, because of drugs. It’s a true testament to the power of great musicians when they can so beautifully give thanks to people who have done so much for them, in such a respectful and delicate manner. It’s songs like these that prove that not all people who choose to take drugs are self destructive and emotionally unstable.
Whilst it’s nice to talk about the seemingly consequence free antics of some bands, it’s never that simple. Case in point: Kurt Cobain. Without a doubt one of the most documented and discussed cases of drug abuse in music. Cobain suffered from a crippling Heroin addiction for the entire time he was in Nirvana. The man has whole books dedicated to his short but incredibly meaningful life, and rightly so. He was the spearhead of Grunge, an incredibly popular genre of music that took over the world for much of the 90’s. Metallica summed up Grunge perfectly when they admitted that it killed off Metal at the time. All of a sudden the leather studded jackets and codpieces of the late 80’s were being traded in, and everyone was shopping for flannel shirts at their local charity shop. Bands like Alice In Chains, Pearl Jam, and Soundgarden traded in flashy guitar solo’s for a raw, guttural distorted sound. It was real, it was angry and it was good.
Suffering from chronic pains brought on by bronchitis, and an underlying stomach condition that was never diagnosed. Drugs were Cobain’s escape, the effects they would have on his life were always transcribed eloquently into every song he would write. Whilst none of his music really deals with drug abuse in a frank nature, it is obvious that it took a massive toll on him. The early days of Nirvana were at times very tongue in cheek, and at the height of their popularity its hard to deny that on the face of things, Cobain struggled with the wave of popularity he was forced to surf on.
“I’m on warm milk and laxatives
Cherry-flavored antacids”
– Penny Royal Tea
These lyrics can be interpreted a number of ways, but one of the most popular theories is that they are the feelings of someone on massive Heroin withdraws, the debilitating stomach pains settling in and making it impossible to eat, or enjoy anything around you. Pennyroyal Tea as a song is devilishly macabre. Which doesn’t seem so strange when viewed through the prism of hindsight, it was one of the last songs written before Cobain died, and the tone of the whole album it came from shifted to a more gritty, realistic and grounded view when compared to the anthemic and anarchic ‘Nevermind’ before it.
Cobain’s life will always be the antithesis of true talent being ripped apart and destroyed by uncontrollable addiction. Along with Amy Winehouse, it’s hard to try and think of artists who had more potential and were idolized by so many, to then lose it all. Had Cobain been clean, would he of maintained the edgy and sophisticated style that he developed in his time on earth? It’s impossible to say, he had an ability to perfectly vocalise the feelings felt by the outsiders, the punk, goths and emo’s that were always left on the fringes of society. Would this have been possible had he been a completely together, normal 20 year old with a shitty job at a fast food restaurant? It’s hard to say. All that we can take away from his incredible life is that sometimes the sentiment ‘The beautiful ones are always taken early’ rings true in this scenario.
Whilst it’s important to remember that drugs are of course, by their very nature, bad for your health, it is with good reason so many people today choose to take them. There are people that would argue that Coffee, Fast food, Cigarettes and Alcohol are all just as bad, and it’s really quite subjective. Whats important to know, whether it be alcohol, or anything else in life is that you should always keep it together. Not knowing when to stop is what differentiates a super successful but borderline addict from becoming another tombstone in the graveyard of Rock and Roll.
Lately, Beth and I have been pondering the ever growing disparity between the lyrics of some of the greatest, and the words put forth by artists who probably have more money than sense. Today is my turn to list my favourite, as well as others that stick out like a gangrene laden thumb.
Lyrics are the backbone of any song, they possess the power to connect to the listener on a level that is unparalleled in all aspects of music. Whether they come from the heart, or are just complete gibberish designed to keep the song moving, chances are that someone will get it, and that song will go from being a mediocre song, to a fantastic song, all in one meandering sentence. Some artists possess the power to write incredibly moving songs, people like, Cobain, Bowie and Mercury will always go down as some of the greatest musicians, and thats because their songs are straight from the heart. Some people however are Robbie Williams, whose lyrics are a by product of cocaine, arrogance and idiocy. Except ‘Angels’ that song fucking rocked. With that in mind, we’re going to list off some of The Good, The Bad, and The Ugliest lyrics that have ever graced, 8-Track, CD, Vinyl, Tape, or MP3.
Good: David Bowie- “Heroes”“Though nothing, nothing will keep us together. We can beat them, for ever and ever. Oh we can be Heroes, just for one day”
Possibly one of the best, if not most recognisable songs from Davey B’s Berlin trilogy “Heroes” is one of the jewels in the crown of Ziggy Stardust. The beauty in this song lies layers deep, for not many people know that the quotation marks around the title are quite intentional. The irony of course being that the triumph and beauty of the relationship presented in the song is overshadowed by the impact and social implications of the Berlin Wall. Hilariously the irony was completely lost on the X Factor who used it as a charity single for Help For Heroes, but what can you expect from the minds that brought us Steve Brookstein? I could write for days about how great of a songwriter he is, but the fact remains that lyrically “Heroes” sores head and shoulders above so much of the pop tat of the 70’s.
Bad: Watch The Throne – Niggas In Paris“She said Ye can we get married at the mall? I said look you need to crawl ‘fore you ball, Come and meet me in the bathroom stall. And show me why you deserve to have it all”
A rare moment. Kanye West is talking about someone other than Kanye West! The person does happen to be cankering for his hand in marriage, and willing to fellate him in a public toilet, but this is Kanye West acknowledging someone else in a song. Paris has many brilliant lyrics, I can only begin to ponder the deep meaning of lines like “Whats 50 grand to a mother fucker like me” I don’t know Jay? What is. Ok the song is all a bit self serving, pompous and arrogant, but annoyingly it is really catchy, and one of the best rap songs of recent times. Thats doesn’t really excuse the patent self indulgence, but when you can afford to pay all your critics to shut the fuck up, why not.
Ugly: Tyler, The Creator- Bitch Suck Dick“Shut up Bitch, suck my dick. You fucking Bop, you better swallow it”
Ok, i’ll preface this by saying that Tyler is one of my favourite rappers ever, and it could of course be argued that as with all of his work, he plays up to the stereotype of rap today, purely to get a reaction and make everyone look at what we accept as normal in modern Rap. However, taken for face value, these lyrics are quite ugly. It’s the kind of statement that appeals to the lowest common denominator. Theres not really much you can say about it. Congratulations on having a bitch that sucks dick. Personally, I like to add another layer of ingenuity to it, by pretending that the song uses the word Bitch correctly, transforming it into the story of a slutty Doberman in cute matching underwear, but i do feel I may be in the minority with that one.
Good: Arctic Monkeys- Arabella“Arabella’s got some interstellar ‘Gator skin boots, and a helter skelter ’round her little finger, and I ride it endlessly”
There isn’t enough good things to say about Arctic Monkeys latest album, and lyrically none of the songs are better than Arabella, whilst being a pretty direct rip-off, or if you prefer “Spiritual successor” to Black Sabbaths War Pigs, it stands on its own two feet as one of the best love letters ever written. The word play is simply fantastic, not simply satisfied with pointing out that he is wrapped around her finger, Alex Turner uses the imagery of a helter skelter, pure beauty. Arctic Monkeys built a fanbase on writing songs that sounds incredible, but also tell an interesting story and this is no different. After 5 albums you’d think the boys would have lost it, but this just proves that the best is almost certainly still to come.
Bad: Robbie Williams- Rock DJ“Me with the floorshow, Kickin’ with your torso, Boys getting high, And the girls even more so”
Drugs eh? They’re bloody brilliant. Unless you’re Robbie Williams trying to write a follow up to the hugely successful album “The Ego Has Landed” Robbie has often admitted he doesn’t know the words to Rock DJ, and thats understandable, its mostly gibberish. What do the first two line of that sentence mean? Me with the floorshow?! ME WITH THE FLOORSHOW?! Robbie, what are you trying to say. Stop talking shit Robbie. It is utter nonsense, but, as before, its incredibly catchy nonsense. When faced with the choice of singing along when hearing this song, or being quiet, for fear of judgement from my peers, singing along always wins hands down. Points to Robbie for some of his songs, Angels is up there with some of the best love songs of all time, but Rock DJ is one of the most sinfully bad, a blatant by product of a classic Williams coke binge.
Ugly: Cannibal Corpse- I Cum Blood“I pissed in her maggot filled asshole, Fucking the rotting, My semen is bleeding”
Yeah, this happened, ummmm. Where do I start, a doctor I suppose. Cannibal Corpse seems to be what happens when you take one of the machines used for the national lottery, and fill it with all the swear words, some sexual imagery, chuck in a couple of skanky animals as the bonus balls, and then do a draw. Unlike the lottery though, when Cannibal Corpse do their thing, everyones a winner. Whilst no one can doubt the technical skill of all the instrument bearing members of CC, some of the lyrics are just obscenity for the sake of obscenity. Theres so much to be said for “I pissed in her Maggot filled asshole” As someone who has, with moderate success, pissed in a bottle, I can’t help but feel that the technical skill required to do this should be respected. Twofold when you consider the aforementioned asshole is Maggot filled. If nothing else, I cum blood is a fantastic advert for the practice of safe sex, wrap it up kids.
So there’s just a taster of lyrics that have really gone the extra mile in their particular field. If you agree or disagree, feel free to comment, or tweet me at @c_spearman and stay tuned for my cohorts suggestions soon.
Nevermind 